Prioritize You: Fill Your Cup with Love
Prioritizing yourself & filling your cup with love means to:
Stop people pleasing.
I'm sure we've all experienced those moments when we agreed to something we didn't want to do or said "yes" when we really wanted to say "no." Who can relate? Some might say it’s part of being a good friend, partner, parent, sibling, etc., and that makes sense. We should do our absolute best to be there for those who matter to us, even if it sometimes requires going out of our way. However, there's a fine line between supporting those we care about and repeatedly saying yes to requests that may not serve our best interests.
Consistently inconveniencing ourselves can sometimes have a lasting negative impact on our mental well-being, which as a result affects our quality of life. Therapy provides a safe space to explore the origins of people-pleasing tendencies and the automatic thoughts that lead us to believe that inconveniencing ourselves is the right choice. It's important to examine how often we engage in this behavior, the situations in which it occurs, and the cost it entails. If something negatively impacts you, I want to reassure you that it's perfectly okay to say, "I'm sorry, I can't commit to that," or "I can't at this time." Doing so can be liberating and make you wonder why you didn’t embrace these techniques sooner.
A key benefit of establishing healthy boundaries and learning to say no without experiencing anxiety, guilt, or a similar emotion is that once you've mastered it, you're all set—there's no turning back! The saying "easier said than done" definitely fits when it comes to shaking off the habit of people-pleasing. It's one of those things that sounds simple in theory, however is much tougher to put into practice. I recognize that everyone has different communication styles; some people are more passive, while others are more direct. In my therapeutic approach, I consider each client's unique characteristics and traits to help them reduce people-pleasing behaviors and boost their self-esteem.
My goal is to guide you towards feeling confident in your communication and comfortable saying no without worrying about it later, because I am here to tell you, it’s not worth it. This can be incredibly freeing, and I am here to support you on this journey.
Let Go.
It's totally normal to sometimes get caught up in things beyond our control—I mean, we're only human! That said, learning to focus on what we can control is definitely a skill, and like most skills, it takes practice. It's easier said than done, for sure.
In therapy, you’ll learn techniques like mindfulness and cognitive restructuring to shift your focus inward and build self-awareness and resilience. Us human beings are incredibly resilient, and we prove this to ourselves every day! We've all faced our own challenges and come out stronger on the other side, and we should absolutely be proud of that.
Letting go of what's holding us back can be incredibly freeing and can greatly improve our quality of life. In therapy, though, the key is that this process has to come from within. You need to genuinely believe in your ability to let go in order to truly experience that sense of freedom.
During times like this, it's essential to show yourself compassion and grace. Releasing the past gives you the strength to move forward into a brighter future. My approach is to hold you accountable and encourage you to make the most of the time between our sessions. This helps you track your progress and enables us to discuss what has been working well and what might need more attention during our sessions. Consider me your accountability partner, here to support you in the process of letting go—something that has been personally transformative for me. I'm absolutely committed to doing my part, as long as you stay committed to doing yours.
It's also crucial to understand that letting go doesn't imply you're indifferent or uncaring. On the contrary, it shows that you care deeply but have developed a realistic and healthy way of thinking that benefits your quality of life.
Rise Above.
Therapy can be an incredibly helpful tool for anyone looking to tackle life's challenges head-on. It provides a chance to dig deeper into understanding our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Often, we overlook how much our early experiences can shape us as adults. We might not even realize the impact of past experiences until they surface in relationships or situations that make us uneasy. This can literally happen at any given moment!
Maybe a partner has pointed out traits that cause friction, and you're left confused. Or perhaps certain situations trigger anxiety or some mixed emotions you can’t explain and you can't pinpoint why. That’s where therapy comes in—it helps us pause, reflect, and better understand what might be holding us back. By doing so, we can learn healthier ways to cope and become more aware of ourselves.
This journey encourages a sense of fulfillment and reminds us that we are unique individuals capable of overcoming any obstacle. We truly do hold the power to define how we move forward, and no past experience or emotion can control us unless we allow it. It's about reclaiming that power and ensuring our feelings don't dictate how we approach each day.